Gmail Ads

Dear Google:

I appreciate that I haven’t been in the very best of moods lately and that some of my recent emails might have reflected my grumpiness.

I understand that the majority of my internet searches, emails, thoughts, and other free time center around horses. What can I say? With only a month left of pregnancy I’m jonesing pretty bad to get back in the saddle again.

I also appreciate that your ads are designed around my email/search content, and not the product of an marketing effort.

Nevertheless…

NO.

NO, I DO NOT NEED A HORSE INCINERATOR.

PLEASE STOP SUGGESTING THAT I GO BUY ONE. IT’S COMPLETELY DISTURBING.

I don’t care if it’s a “high-quality unit”.

I don’t care that you’re offering it at discount prices.

Why would you even think I NEED a machine that incinerates animals, much less a “USED” one?

That’s really, really, really gross.

Sincerely,

Becky, the non-horse-burning Gmail user

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5 thoughts on “Gmail Ads

  1. Okay, I admit to ignorance…and I *don't* want to google the term “horse incinerator” lest I be badgered with ads to buy something I'm pretty sure I don't need.

    So, what IS a horse incinerator? Like, to burn a whole horse? Is there a big market for those (even on sale?)

    Like

  2. Yay! I just noticed you were back writing. Somehow I missed that you were posting since June or something. I'm sure your last month of preggonancy will be “super fun” and congrats!

    Like

  3. Aarene—

    It's exactly what you would imagine it to be. When you have a carcass you need to dispose of… well…

    UsedAnimalIncinerators.com is apparently THE place to go. (I've never actually gone to the site because I'm scared google will start suggesting more of the same.)

    But seriously… who needs these things?!?! EWWWWW.

    Like

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