Motherhood is weird.
I spend less time parenting than I do shepherding the DragonMonkey around the house as he pingpongs around from danger to danger.
And I catch the weirdest stuff coming out of my mouth.
“Bleach is not for babies.”
“Get your hands out of the toilet.”
“Get that tampon out of your mouth!” <— unused!
“No playing in the trash.”
“Quit making yourself vomit!”
“Knives are not for playing.”
“Don’t eat the cellphone.”
The list goes on. I’m trying to keep track of the strange things I find myself saying, mostly so I can embarrass the DragonMonkey once he’s in high school. Today’s addition to the list?
“Quit licking the cat.”